I suppose I should actually write a new “professionally technologically-based” blog post considering it has been well over a year. It’s not so much that I don’t have anything to say on a professional level… it’s more that I have too much to say and no modicum of an idea as to where I should start.

I’m not going to go back in time (mainly because Apple nor has Google invented a product that allows for this — Time Machine does not count) and write what I should have said for the past 18 months. That’s just dumb. So let’s start with today.

In honor of Steve Jobs’ recent passing (October 5th), I’ll begin with a tribute article to him, his legacy and all the wonderful toys his brilliant mind helped conceive. I’m still a tad bit peeved that they [Apple] does not have iTime (aluminum concealed time travel in a capsule) down yet but I suppose that with time (joke drum) I will overcome this greif.

The iPhone 4s keynote was broadcasted to the world on October 4th where they finally revealed the latest kickass-do-everything-for-you-because-america-is-lazy device. The iPhone 4s sports a dual A5 processor, 8 mega-pixel camera, and a smartass virtual assistant named “Siri.” Is it just me or does every one feel that “siri” is short for serious or some derivative of such a word? It’s like Apple telling you… “yes, we SIRI-ously went there. We created a female voice that can talk back to you as you incessantly bark orders at a 4″ long box of aluminosilicate glass and stainless steel.”

In all seriousness.. again with the puns… Siri actually does seem like a pretty cool concept. For example, one can instruct Siri to phone / text / email his or her significant other by saying “Siri, text my wife / husband that I will be late.” Or Siri, “Text my girlfriend / boyfriend that I am at a meeting tonight. Get dinner without me.” The only major problem I can foresee with this is a decline in job security if you are a mediocre personal assistant. “Congratulations! Thanks to Apple, you have been replaced by an inanimate object!” Obviously, a benefit of this new feature is that you no longer have to explain or justify your personal habits to your assistant. You can have Siri text your girlfriend (or boyfriend), wife (or husband), and mistress (or mister) all in a row. Say good-bye to the rosy-red cheeks of embarrassment!

You can also ask the latest iLazy device the most mundane questions and not be ignored! Another noticeable perk is that this silver-tongued box of entertainment actually carries the weight of something more than a toy from Target! See for yourself…

For more time-wasted pictures of Siri (for those who don’t have Siri within a close enough proximity to play with her yourself) you’ll probably get more than a few laughs out of the Shit-Siri-Says Tubmlr blog.

One thing I would not recommend to do with your excitement about Siri — DO NOT attempt to run around your office calling your co-workers / assistants “Siri.” For some reason, people do not consider this a compliment nor does it have the same warm fuzzy Apple perpetuated effect.